Channels are what they are – an outlet, a vent, a sounding board… A place to let it all out freely or guarded but still a place to rant so you can feel lighter.
I had one of those places, used it for all of two years, and then suddenly it was snatched from me by hackers. Yes, I ran a weekly blog called the underdog series with OJA. I published every Friday and I kept at it for two years even on days I didn’t feel like it. Surprising myself each week with my commitment, consistency, and grit and then all of a sudden it was no more. At first, I couldn’t explain the emotion I felt. I could say that I was angry, and frustrated but somewhere in the mix was the feeling of relief. Yes, I felt relief from this commitment to an assignment that no one had sent me to do in the first place. Now I had a legit excuse for the committed readers who asked why I had stopped.
Like they would smack me if I had stopped without a legit excuse. But the truth is that while I felt relief, I still miss it. My channel even though it was rough around the edges but it was still mine, my vent, my place. A platform where I could talk about anything and issues that bother me and the far-reaching implications. Then it was taken from me. I could have tried to reclaim it for a fee or even recreated another I still may but I’m undecided yet.
Now I’m here ranting as usual to no one in particular and a little more guarded than I would usually be. Trying to see if I could use this platform as a substitute for my channel but still bound by the unspoken decorum that is associated with this space. But with clarity, that my passion to write hasn’t waned but what I am most afraid of is the pressure that comes with the commitment to a defined frequency.
Hence, I will not put myself in a box some people may disagree and say it is good to be consistent but I say I remain unboxed. Hence, I will write when and how I feel like it and that could be daily, weekly, monthly, or even yearly. But I will do me so that this channel will be what it was meant to be and not a box that I’m trapped in.
I understand that some things are meant to have a rhythm and consistency for them to be effective but not my writing.
Cheers to all the people trying to stay consistent but struggling. Just know that you are not alone and you probably don’t need to.
XoXo
OJA